Most of us mean to ring our parents or a good friend more often. The call keeps slipping to a time when things are calmer. A weekly call fixes this by taking the decision out of it. You agree on a day and a time in advance, and both of you know that the call is coming. It is not another chore. It is a small appointment that you actually look forward to.
Fix the day and the time
Talk it through together. Ask what suits them best: a Sunday afternoon, a weekday evening after supper, a Saturday morning with a cup of tea. Choose a time when neither of you is rushing, and when there is little to interrupt. Put it into both calendars, or write it on the wall calendar in the kitchen, so it has a real place. Keep the call simple. It does not need an agenda. Ask how the week has been, what they have been doing, what they have seen or cooked. Tell them a few small things about your own days, even ordinary ones. Have a cup of tea beside you, and put your other screens away, so that you can really listen. If you are apart for a long time, a short call is still worth having.
Decide what happens when the day does not work. Someone is busy, the train is late, the friend has visitors. Agree in advance that you will simply move the call to the next evening, and send a short message to say so. A missed call is not a failure. It is just a call that has moved. A note in the calendar helps you both remember the new arrangement.
Look for small ways to make the call richer. Keep a scrap of paper by the phone during the week and jot down things you would like to tell them. Write down the names of people they mention, so that you can ask after them next time. If you both enjoy it, send a photograph before the call, and talk about it together. That is all it takes to keep a friendship or a family tie in regular touch.
